Life has a way of knocking us down, especially when we’re dealing with the struggles of those we love. There’s no pain like the pain of your children. My daughter Sash is struggling to find any joy or meaning in her life and her pain and misery almost sent me spiralling over into my own brand of uncontainable misery and fear. But sometimes, the universe has a way of throwing us a lifeline just when we need it most.
The Serendipity of a Timely Message
I was crying at my desk. My mind racing, my heart thumping when an email landed in my inbox. Its subject line caught my eye: “Upekka – Fall down seven times, get up eight.” In that moment, it felt like more than just a coincidence; it was a serendipitous reminder of the power of equanimity.
Serendipity, those happy accidents that seem perfectly timed, often carry messages we need to hear. It’s as if the universe conspires to guide us back to balance when we’re most off-kilter. This email was my compass in the blizzard of emotions I was experiencing.
This timely reminder of equanimity led me to take action, transforming my emotional state through a simple yet powerful practice
Understanding Upekka
Upekka, or equanimity, is about maintaining balance and composure regardless of external circumstances. It’s not about indifference, but about finding an unshakeable centre amidst life’s storms
A woman on my meditation course called Sarah, a single mum of three, uses a very similar practice during her children’s tantrums. She said that it helped her to respond with patience instead of frustration and that it changed the whole household dynamic.Her experience illustrates how equanimity can be applied in everyday life, even in the most chaotic moments.
The Power of Pausing
So, back to me. instead of spiralling further, I decided to take a moment and engage with the meditation suggested in the email. It was a choice to pause, to step back from the edge of emotional tsunami and create space for something different.
As I began the practice, focusing on the mantra “Aham Brahmasmi – I am the Universe,” I felt a shift. The act of pausing and turning inward allowed me to:
- Break the cycle of rumination
- Connect with a sense of inner calm
- Gain perspective on the situation
The Ripple Effect
This moment of practicing equanimity didn’t magically solve all our problems or instantly make Sash better. However, it did something equally important: it changed how I showed up in the situation. By finding my own balance, I was better equipped to support Sash without being pulled under by the intensity of her struggles.
Embracing Life’s Curriculum
Life often presents us with challenges that feel overwhelming. But as Pema Chodron suggests, we can view these challenges as our “curriculum for the day”. Each difficulty is an opportunity to practice equanimity, to fall down and get back up again.
By embracing this perspective, we open ourselves to the serendipitous moments that can guide us back to balance. We learn to trust the process, even when the path ahead isn’t clear.
Moving Forward: Lessons In Resilience
As I continue to navigate this challenging time with Sash, I carry with me the lesson from this serendipitous moment:
- Pause when emotions run high
- Practice equanimity through meditation and mindfulness
- Trust in the process, even when it’s difficult
- Remain open to the guidance that life offers, often in unexpected ways
Key Takeaway
Remember, equanimity isn’t about never falling down. It’s about cultivating the strength and resilience to get up that eighth time, no matter what life throws our way. And sometimes, all it takes is a well-timed reminder to help us find our footing again.
In the face of life’s challenges, may we all find the balance to fall down seven times, and get up eight.
Yoga Pathways 
Leave a comment