Yoga Pathways

Who doesn’t hate being interviewed?

I started spiralling out of control on Monday. My interview with the British School of Meditation (BSoM) for their podcast wasn’t until Thursday afternoon, I spotted the signs immediately—it wasn’t hard, falling into a familiar, frustrating pattern: binge eating. My body was trying, in its own way, to cope with a swirling storm of anxiety and uncertainty. I was nervous, not just because the interview mattered, but because I felt utterly out of control. I find this brand of the unknown extremely daunting; I had no idea what questions they would ask. That lack of control stirred a deep unease inside me. Alongside the fear and anxiety was a huge vat of frustration—and a complete lack of self-compassion. I was bloody annoyed with myself for reacting this way.

My inner critic, of course, had opinions. “FFS, it’s just a chance to talk about your special interests. Why are you making such a mountain out of a molehill?” My conscious mind knew I was losing perspective, but that awareness didn’t stop the panic rising.

As Thursday approached, I was terrified I might freeze or say something idiotic. How could I worry about having nothing to say on my two favourite topics—yoga and meditation? Yet that tug of shame, ego, and self-doubt was relentless, leaving me handcuffed by feelings that felt totally disproportionate. The pattern was familiar, but it still caught me off guard. I saw just how much I’d learned about self-sabotage—not just intellectually, but from lived experience.

The fact that the interview would be over Zoom added to the pressure. I find the rhythm of online conversations tricky—those stop-start moments, the awkwardness of talking over someone, the absence of real physical presence. All of it fed my anxiety and made me hyper-aware of what could go wrong.

But sitting with these fears—actually naming them and feeling their weight—reminded me of something at the heart of yoga: everything will pass, both the light and the dark, the ease and the struggle. As yoga philosophy teaches, impermanence is the nature of life; all experiences, pleasant or difficult, inevitably shift and move on. This perspective helped me hold my anxiety a little more lightly, knowing it too was a wave passing through.

Over the years, my meditation practice—deepened by both personal experience and teaching—has become my anchor. It has sharpened my self-awareness enough to spot old patterns as they start to take hold, rather than letting them run unchecked. So, I met the fear quite consciously. I acknowledged it, did the necessary prep work for the interview (even anticipating things I might find interesting to share), and then made more time to meditate—to take myself out of that future-focused loop of imagined disasters and bring myself back into the present moment, where my fears lose a little of their grip.

Recognising and working with these feelings in real time is rarely comfortable, but it’s where growth happens. The practice isn’t about eliminating fear or anxiety—it’s about seeing them for what they are: waves arising and dissolving on the larger ocean of experience.

Experiencing fear or anxiety prior to significant events is a common. It happens to most of us at some point.  How do you meet those moments? Are there practices, intentions, or rituals that help you move from future-focused worry back into the present? What works for you?

Sometimes, simply naming our fears and letting them pass—through meditation, mindful movement, or honest self-reflection—can open the doorway to authentic transformation.

This post is the first in a two-part series about my journey through the BSoM interview experience. Here, I’ve shared the fears, self-doubt, and self-sabotage that surfaced beforehand. In the next part, I’ll share some of the amazing things that I learned just by stepping through fear.